Jessica Biel Shares the Secret to Being a ‘Perfect Mom’ and We Are Here for It

Jessica Biel spilled the secret to perfect parenting, and let’s just say it’s a major plot twist. The Sinner actress revealed “how she does it” on the seriously small screen (as in your phone through TikTok).

The mother of two sons, Silas, 8, and Phineas, 3, who she shares with music/actor Justin Timberlake, shared a video of herself getting ready for the day. Biel, rocking a mom bun, starts putting on makeup, and then says, "Get ready with me while I tell you the secret to being a perfect mom.”

What is it? Wait for it, wait for it…actually, keep waiting for it. The video’s caption reads, “Groundbreaking, I know.” While the caption was a tease, Biel’s unspoken message might feel rather groundbreaking, refreshing, and downright helpful for mental health.

See, the actress who once played the rather imperfect Mary Camden on 7th Heaven isn’t trying to tell parents that the big secret is putting on makeup. Instead, it sounds like Biel is—get this—reminding us that there’s no such thing as a perfect mom.

In less than 20 seconds, Biel took down the unfair pressure society places on parents—especially moms to do the impossible by getting things 200% correct 100% of the time.

Parenting can feel lonely and stressful, and the pressure to get it all right is real, especially in the age of social media. Biel likely posted the video to try to lift a significant burden from parents—especially moms—who are carrying a massive load (especially mentally). Judging from the comments? Mission accomplished.

“Silence speaks in volumes,” wrote one person in the comments.

I’ll say.

“I needed that,” said someone else.

“I knew I was doing it right! Just like you said!” said one great mom.

“Nailed it,” another person replied.

Even non-parents were buying what Biel was selling.

“I'm not even a mom, and I was waiting to hear the secret—well played,” wrote a top commenter.

No, There Are No Perfect Moms

Real talk: Biel isn’t the first person with a large following to put it out there that there’s no such thing as a perfect parent. In fact, as a mom, the algorithms frequently recommend content with this reminder.

Still, I hope Biel isn’t the last person to send this message for so many reasons. For starters, as one commenter mentioned, the content might be the precise thing a parent needs to hear in the moment. Maybe someone was late to pick up or got hammered by an in-law for their parenting approach.

When people like Biel, who we often see with makeup and designer duds already on, share this content, it makes people feel less alone.

What’s more, even though it’s out there that no one is perfect, we moms also get conflicting messages, especially on social media (but off of it, too). I spent so much time criticizing myself because my second wasn’t sleeping for eight hours by eight weeks. I basically had to exit social media during the holidays because I couldn’t take all the advice about how I “should” be approaching gifts, Elf-ing (we proudly Elf), Santa (we’re all about the magic and “lying to our kids”).

I know so many other moms who felt they were less than because they didn’t feed their children a certain way or have a specific type of birth, as if the way we birth and feed our children for the first years of their lives defines our parenting. It doesn’t, but that message is out there, too.   

This message is particularly unfair in this country—the richest in the world—that expects parents to do it all without much support in return. See: No federal paid leave and the child care cliff we threw ourselves off in September 2023. 

I’ll also say this: I haven’t really returned to the social media space, as I’ve basically decided to exit the comparison chat. Yet, I’ve noticed I’m my own biggest critic.

Thoughts that live rent-free in my head include, “Should I be working less and spending more time with my kids?” “Should I be organizing more playdates for my kids?” and “Am I a bad mom for giving my kids mini-muffins for breakfast and lunch?” (I did the last one today.) So, we get hit from all angles—social, family, and even ourselves. It’s hard to escape the pressure to be a “perfect mom.”

Hopefully, messages like Biel’s serve as a much-needed detour during your nightly scroll or negative self-talk session. There’s no such thing as a perfect mom. If you’re that worried that you’re not, it’s safe to say you’re an excellent one.